Did I publish a blog in 2021?

I didn't focus on this page during 2021, and like my plants, it wilted. I barely harvested or tended to it at all this year.

I began a blog in August 2021 called, Happiness Noir. it was a warm up to the NaNoWriMo, but then, my dog died. That little fella was the last of my former life, before the metaphorical walls fell down around me. Grief has no time stamp. A LOT came to the surface.

Every writer knows, don't kill the dog no matter what. Sadly, a lot of our family and friends passed away this year. Mine and yours.

I think we collectively got tired of death, and yet, we are continuing the divide and the struggle.

Thus, Happiness Noir was born.

I realized there was a hole in the veil of the positive psychology movement that was utterly insensitive to those who were grieving. Personally, I was enraged by people making "positivity" statements toward those who were grieving.

Could they be any more insensitive to the vibe of the room?

"Think positively" made me angry, every time I heard it. How inappropriate! Gross 'cause I also know that a lot of it was based in profit margins rather than the health and wellness of the public.

The circle of life has been a theme.

Watching how some people respond to that circle has been an education.

I've been writing, working with people who have overcome enormous obstacles and painting. Staying primarily to myself, thinking about the past half a century of life experiences and writing some more.

A lot broke open. A lot was destroyed. That's the universe for you. Things end, while other things are just beginning.

I learned about Tik Tok for the first time. About a month ago, after Rocco passed on. It's the MOST addictive thing I've seen to date in social media land. One can quickly become fixated on the fast messages, scrolls and live action drama.

It's a sociologists dream! Talk about people creating problems for their problems! Some people are delivering fun, or funny content. Others? Darkness that we just don't need right now.

Best to stay away from it for any longer than a few minutes.

I changed my focus. I only want to invite in the things that bring me joy while walking away from the things that make my brain hurt.

I've shared thousands of images, YouTubers, and other media on my own social media from experts in every field on healing after Narcissistic abuse. Doctor Ramani seems to be leading that initiative. At least, she's my favorite resource. The Holistic Psychologist, Dr. LePera is my favorite self-heal guru. Both are psychologists out of California. Then, there's Psychiatrist, Dr. Judith Orloff. She combines a healing from a psychology and a psychic/empath POV. Again, California.

I might have to go live in Cali. The science CAN be infused with a more ancient practice of healing. And is! Something I never got in rural, upstate NY.

In other news

It was a year of the potato for me, while my son blosomed into a strong, fit, kind young man. To say that it's surreal that this is the last year of formal parenting, is an understatement. He's a senior. All of my personal time is there, as a parent, soaking up my last year as a full time Mom to a kid. .... Next stop, college!

I'm also realizing that my true calling and my true interests are not fully aligned with each other. My lack of fitness hasn't helped. So, 2022 is going to be all about proper fitness, nutrition and living out that life of alignment.

We mothers, and I'm sure fathers, who fly solo in the upbringing of our offspring, ... those of us who are hands on, present on a daily basis, are living a different reality than others. I actually felt quite blue the other day, so flipped on a Disney movie to bring back my kid's childhood.

Watching those movies together as a family was in fact, pretty magical. There are a million little things I wish I would do differently, if I could have, but obviously, we can't live in our past.

For people who are unpacking a lot of trauma, or processing grief, the world has a different lens on it, than for those who have never experienced something. The colors are more vivid, yet the concerns or complaints of others don't seem to have as much significance. They seem, inconsequential in the greater scheme of life.

The #1 thing that broke my heart (besides the death of my dog) was realizing that the things that traumatized my youth are still practiced and accepted today. This IS a topic I'm tackling this year to come. I'm not just ruffling feathers. I'm going to ask my cats to help me eat the whole bird. Exposure therapy at it's finest.

The weight that we carry through life (metaphorically and literally) seems to be ours, and ours alone. Mine was heavy on both fronts this year.

The ONE thing that stands out above all the rest is this ...

The life we live is ours to choose.

Nobody else has the right to decide who we are. So, if we want to be our true, authentic self, we will be exactly where we are supposed to be. We are human, and humans go through things.

Let's turn 2022 into an Authentic; Creative; Curious; Loving; Healthy; Fur=baby filled life of love and laughter.

Happy Winter Solstice to all ~ (or Summer Solstice to everyone on the other side of the planet).

k Aren ~


Follow me if you'd like but if you are a frienamie, just know that ... I have a Tik Tok and I'm not afraid to use it! :) LOL

I am the 1st to say ~ social media has NOT been my priority ... and this year, I suppose I'll have to hire a social media manager so I have more than 19 followers. LOL

Linkedin Which may or may not survive the great resignation of my own interests. :)

Facebook Sharing and Disseminating Info on healing

Twitter 19 followers and counting

HappinessNoir Balancing out the need to always be happy

Tumblr (for writing research storage, but no idea why). :)

OH, and I'm also going to write on Medium and a few others, but I'll announce those.

Medium only has one published ... still trying to figure out what that puppy looks like

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